Wednesday, September 30, 2009

On Going Gray

Yes, it's been a while. More on that at another time.

At the age of 39, I am letting my hair grow in gray.

I know that women have been doing this for millennia, and bestselling books have been written about it, but it's a big deal for me. I've thought about it for years, and have finally decided that I don't have the patience or the vanity to mess with hair color any more. I hate it. I hate having it done and I hate doing it myself even more. I hate being pulled through caps. I hate foil. I hate that the smell makes me throw up. I hate the time that it takes. I hate the expense. But most of all, I hate that I have to justify why I'm letting my hair grow in gray at the age of 39. So, it stops here.

I've been getting gray hairs (silver, actually) since I was in high school. I colored and/or highlighted my hair because my natural color is Mouse Brown and I've always wanted to be Blonde, Brunette, or Golden Retriever. I told myself that it was something that women do all of the time, and that it is a rite of passage. I tried to believe that it was part of being pampered and well-tended. I could barely stand to make the appointments to get it done, even when I worked immediately next door to my hair salon.

I see women every day that obviously spend an enormous amount of time and money on their hair. Southern women in particular are very invested in the entire "beauty" process, and we hear of even the littlest girls getting their nails done regularly. I have certainly never fallen into that high maintenance bucket, nor do I want to. Any regimen that takes me more than half an hour to complete in the morning is way too much for me. It's simply not who I am. But, I don't want to be seen as a frumpy slob, either.

The compromise that I'm going to make with myself is that I am going to continue to take excellent care of my complexion and let the gray grow out. I have beautiful skin, without any sign of wrinkles. I have finally found a regimen that I love, even though it's not cheap. And, if it really freaks me out when my hair completely grows in gray, I can always go back to color. I will work hard not to let that happen.

2 comments:

Teresa Kravtin said...

My story was that I loved my natural hair color in all my younger years and would NEVER have thought of coloring it. I loved the natural me. Except when the gray inevitably came. I had said, "I will honor my gray hair, because I've earned it." I thought it was distinguishing on every else. I still do. Except that I'm a total WIMP about me. Color like CRAZY!! I can live in denial about being fifty. What??? I'm fifty? Anyway, it helps that I have a great stylist in a small town who doesn't charge an arm and a leg, and I don't have to really think about it, except to make sure I have appointments prior to lots of people seeing me. I can pretend I'm still thirty for a while yet.

Christine said...

If it works for you, that's wonderful! It seems to work for everyone but me. It doesn't help that my beloved husband, at 8 days older than I am, doesn't have a gray hair on his head. I am afraid of looking like a hag next to him. But, other than that, my resolve is strong.