Shredder Girl

Oh, yeah... I wanted to tell you about my great triumph this last weekend! Of course, it was borne of panic, but it worked out well in the end.

My desk in my office is a train wreck. I have always had these grand ideas for organization, but I'm not a naturally organized person so it was nothing more than a pipe dream. But, the one thing that I did keep on top of was the Travel file. H and I go to lots of live concerts, so the Travel file is where we keep all of the tickets and other pertinent information.

H is going to Florida in June to see Pearl Jam in Fort Lauderdale and Tampa (I'm going to pass, thank you very much). The tickets came a few weeks ago. I remember clearly seeing them on the center island in the kitchen and then they vanished. I thought that I had probably put them in the Travel file, but I Couldn't Find Them. So, being the nutjob that I am, I started to panic. I realized after a few days that the best way to look for them was to finally take the time to organize the drawers and files and pray to God that the tickets were in there. So, on Sunday morning, I got the big garbage can, extra bags, and the shredder, and went through every document in the drawers. Boy, are they beautiful now.

As you probably already guessed, there was no sign of the tickets.

I had just finished the project, and was about to start looking for replacement tickets on Stub Hub when H came in to find out why the cats were freaking out (because of the shredder, of course). I showed him my handiwork, he dutifully made impressed noises, and then I gently broached the topic of not being able to find the tickets. He looked at me like I was a complete moron and said that he told me that he was going to put them in his night stand and I acknowledged that as a good idea. Oh, really? Was I sober or paying attention during this conversation?

He went upstairs and got the tickets while I did deep-breathing exercises to calm down. The tickets are now in their special home and all is right with the world. At least my desk is finally cleaned out! I wonder what else I could lose? I'm sure that there's something that I need desperately in the garage.

This is going to keep me awake, I know it

There is something insanely hot about John King from CNN messing around with his voting district touch-screen. I'm trying hard not to think impure thoughts. I should never have turned the TV on because I have to get up early tomorrow.

Utter destruction... and me in my bra

A few months ago, our closet imploded. We had lived in the house for just over 3 years at that point, and the shelves in the closet were typical crappy wire shelves stuck into the drywall. When we moved in, we shoved everything that we were too lazy to find a place for into the closet, and there it stayed. My blood pressure shot up just walking in to it. One Sunday afternoon, I heard a huge "WHOOOOOMP" and tried to open the door to no avail. Approximately 11 feet of wire shelves, packed to the gills with entirely too many clothes that don't fit and sweaters that are too warm for Tennessee hit the floor. Large chunks of drywall came out with them. The shelves were twisted beyond recognition.

So, what did I do? Me, who at one time wanted to be an ER doc because I think well on my feet? I melted down. Not just an "oh, mother fucker" meltdown, but a weeping and snarling and refusing to let H anywhere near me to help clean the pathetic mess up. My meltdown was fueled by the fact that H was about to go to church imminently. He offered to stay to help sort it all out (and, to his credit and my eternal gratitude, did stay) but I wanted him to be out of my house and my sight and not come back for a very long time until I figured it all out.

It goes without saying that I was off my meds at this point. No job + no desire to go to doctor + general feelings of "okay, just let me die now" = lunatic.

It took us about an hour to get all of the debris out of the closet and (somewhat) organized on the bed in one of the spare bedrooms. It took days to be able to speak to each other again.

Eventually, we went to Lowe's and bought new shelves. H had expressed doubt from the beginning, but I was determined that we would be able to put them up and that they would be just as strong and marvelous, if not more so, than the originals. I put them up when he was at work one day, and showed off my labors like a 5-year-old bringing home artwork for Mommy. He shook his head and humored me. We probably spent about $100.

Ever since then, I have held my breath every time that I walked into the closet. I knew that it was a matter of time before the tsunami hit again, but I had no idea that it would be so soon. This is where it gets weird, though. I keep my pajamas in my dresser, which is outside of the closet. Tonight, for whatever reason, I chose to change into my pajamas IN the closet, putting my dirty clothes directly into the hamper. I was able to get the bottoms on without incident, but all hell broke loose once I got my shirt off. One of the two shelves collapsed, and I screamed for help (wearing my bra and pajama bottoms). H came running, expecting bloodshed at the least, and was not at all surprised to see most of his clothes dangling by one or two drywall screws.

We put the clothes on the bed in the spare bedroom yet again, and then H vanished into the media room. I am sure that he was expecting another full meltdown. I went downstairs, poured myself a glass of wine, and started researching shelving units on line. All of the options suck.

1. We can buy more stupid wire shelves and count the minutes until they collapse.
2. We can buy some shelving units at Lowe's that we would have to assemble ourselves and would cost us probably $1000 by the time that we got everything that we needed.
3. We can call in the professionals.
   

We're opting for #3. I can't even imagine how much this will cost us. Thank God for home equity loans.

Eight Belles

Rest in peace, beautiful girl. What a horrific end to such an elegant race.

I am really upset by this. Even more upsetting is that we hear every day about people that violently all over the world and that rarely bothers me as much as this did. What is wrong with us that we are so desensitized by the death of humans? Is it that animals are innocent, and somehow humans deserve it? Or that there are so many horrible human deaths that we can't keep up with them?

Added on Tuesday the 6th:

The death count in Myanmar is over 200,000 from the cyclone over the weekend and they still won't cover it on the local news. Quelle surprise. But, they're still talking about the horse.

Oh, okay

I took the Lexapro. Of course, it took me this long to get the guts to do it (it's after midnight now). I hope that it doesn't keep me awake, although there probably wouldn't be enough in my system to make a difference.

Now, all I have to do is come up with a good reason why I'm taking it without a prescription when I go in to see my doctor on the 29th. She's a very nice person, so hopefully, she won't yell too much. It would serve me right, though.

Lexapro

I've tried Wellbutrin, and it turned me into a psycho bitch. H didn't tell me that until after I had taken it for months. Go figure. I've tried Effexor, and it makes me nauseous and doesn't allow me to sleep. I've been off of it for a few months now, because my prescription ran out and I haven't been able to bear the thought of going into the doctor. Vicious circle, yes.

H has about a month's worth of Lexapro samples that he thinks that I should start taking, but I'm nervous about starting it without talking to Dr. D first. I don't see her until May 29. He may kill me before then, though.

I thought that I was doing better, but I must not be if he brought it up tonight. Normally, he never brings it up. It probably doesn't help that I've had 4 glasses of wine tonight.

Enough already

I am sick to death of all of the political coverage. I used to watch CNN pretty much all day every day (which is really too much, granted) but I can't stand to have it on for more than about 10 minutes now. They keep saying the same stupid things about the same stupid candidates, making up scandals as they go along. And, they keep finding new talking heads on a weekly basis. I don't know how the journalists on the "Best Political Team in Television" can stand it.

I've already made up my mind. Give me an absentee ballot and shut up already. Unless, of course, Mr. Obama does something horrendous between now and then. Given the track record of the "current occupant," as Garrison Keillor calls him, I can't see how anything could be worse.